A Fathelete Starts The New Year Mostly Right!

Quick note: As the first day of this hopefully smashing new year dawns, I am ending the vacation eating portion of my vacation early. This means I am not eating everything put in front of me (Hello pie, my secret lovah!) and pretending that it doesn't count. I can see a little extra pinchiness around certain areas (Hello, pie, my secret lovah!) but shockingly everything still fits, even though I've worked out once since I've been here.

Seriously.

So obviously, God either is sparing me from my laziness or waiting until I get back home to slap me with some delayed reaction blubber. Tomorrow, my sister and I are going to some class at her gym called Soul Grooves, which she says is a butt-kicker. I am working on my natural lack of coordination with Armando, my dance guru, so this might be fun. Hell, who am I kidding? It's still gonna hurt like a mofo...Hey, Steve Zahn is gonna be Monk's brother! I love Steve Zahn! He's the Seann William Scott of my generation, yet not so Seann William Scott-y! 

I'm sorry...where was I? Yes...umm...Soul Grooves. I'm a little scared of it but I have a soul and have been known to groove. So we'll see what's up.

A Fathlete Buckles Down For The Holidays...

...and just hopes she can hold her present semi-impressive weight until she sees the relatives that always clock her food.

I have about two days until I fly home to the Hinterlands of Honville (Baltimore) for a long, long vacation where I am relying on other people for transport, for guest passes on their gym membership and for mercy if they have cookies in their homes. I'm headed to swing dancing with Armando the Dance Teacher this afternoon - and I don't mind telling you that those lessons have gotten a lot more demanding. Apparently Armando wasn't fooled by my pleas to take it easy on me. And I'd honestly would be sad if he did. But less sweaty.

I have been watching the dismally cold weather up north from my sunny living room and wondering the same thing everyone else in Florida with northern travel plans is thinking - "Is it too late to tell them I've contracted hoof and mouth disease?" Because it's cold up there. All of you up there are reading this and snorting "Suffer, Princess! Nobody feels sorry for your whiny butt! As Jesse L. Martin was known to say on 'Law and Order,' Sitch yo ass down!"

Fine.

But I'm worried about the running in this weather. People do it. But not me. I am so worried about the yo-yoing, because at 37, I only get so many swings back in the other direction, ya know?

Please write me your tips for how to stay active on vacation, amid the cold and the cookies. Because Sista's not bringing any fat clothes with her! But some elastic.